Two days ago, the Anachronism Intermodal Transportation Center and Mail Depot received an unexpected crate. "It's as though the thing materialized out of thin air," said AITC&MD's manager, Juanita Fernwood. "And it's heavy as all heck. Our poor little forklift is trapped under it."
We welcome yet another revenue source for The City of Anachronism, the Fast Foto drive-up on Main Street near Furd Motors and in the way of operations at the Intermodal Freight Center.
Another lovely billboard recently erupted into our Dear City's skyline. Located sort of next to Wrinkly Field, the board announces the increased advertising budget of Spaulding Produce. Whether you're returning home after a night at the opera or a day at the races, Spaulding Produce has the non-meaty things you crave. From vegetable broth for...
The City of Anachronism welcomes its newest corporate tax payer…uhh, we mean global conglomerate, The Eating Corporation of America (ECA). Now occupying half of the second floor (including the men's restroom) of downtown's Schmern Building is ECA's headquarters for breakfast cereals in states whose names begin with the letter "B." Everyone who's...
The City of Anachronism recently welcomed a new source of tax revenue…I mean, new small business, Bubba's Puppy Wash. Said owner Bubba Lou, "You bring us a dirty pet and we'll return to you a wet one." In addition to basic baths, Bubba's offers color services, balayage, Brazilian hair straightening, extensions, eyebrow weaving, wig fittings, and...
The population at the O'Dell Cemetery is down by one. "This time each year," said John "Digger" O'Dell of O'Dell Mortuary, "Mr. Harris [pictured] gets a little restless. He always comes back around Valentine's Day, though. Usually he's harmless; just don't let him get too close. And above all, don't invite him in for 'a bite'. We'll keep his...
Last week to Anachronism, Something Wicked this way came. Customers' reactions have been overwhelmingly positive about this unique ethnic restaurant. One happy diner told us that she was absolutely bewitched by the cuisine. What's this restaurant's key to success? "I always use fresh ingredients," said chef and owner Glinda North. "There's nothing...
The election season for The City of Anachronism's City Council kicked off today with a rally for T. J. "Schmuckerino" Wilson (known to his friends as Bandini Mountain). Here we see the candidate wrapped in one of his day-wear American flags addressing his core constituency.
Have a relative who's not dead yet? Are you too busy to respond to their incessant cries of "When's lunch" or "I've fallen and I can't get up"? Why not provide them with a luxurious life of checkers and mahjong tournaments at Abandoned Aged: A Senior Community? Located behind the Shabby Rest Motel, the Administration Building offers easy...